Friday, May 27, 2016

Confident Doubting

I earned my black belt in karate about a year ago.  In our style of karate, after a student passes their black belt test, they are officially a student black belt for a year then they can test for their first degree black belt ranking. Tonight was that night for me. I tested for my first degree black belt.

I'll save you the suspense because that isn't my point in this post.  I passed!  My point in telling you about this is to rehash the mental process. When I took my black belt test last year, I was terrified.  I had been preparing for it for 6 1/2 years. It had been postponed several times because I wasn't ready. I knew it would be a physically grueling test...and it didn't disappoint. Four and a half hours of testing, and one month later of waiting, I found out I had passed.  The test tonight was not the test of last year.

 color: UL pink peony

As I approached my big test last year, I was afraid it would be postponed again. I was practicing, but I was still stuck in my head.  About two weeks before my test, God allowed me to have clarity and an open mind to remember what I needed to know.  I thought it wouldn't stick.  I kept waiting for it to dissipate over the next year--but it hasn't.  Tonight I was able to remember.  I was able to perform. I was confident going into the test...until an hour before.  Doubt crept in and reared its ugly head. But it couldn't stay. It wouldn't stay because I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.  I won't say I performed perfectly.  I'm still human after all, but I've turned a corner.  I've proven to myself that I can do hard things.  And now I do.  The pattern has been set.  And now I move forward.

What are you doubting that you will push through today?

Make it a beautiful day, friends.

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