Have you ever had someone tell you they would rather pretend they like you than actually do the work to have a real relationship? It seems like an odd question and who would put themselves in that kind of situation in the first place? It seems it would be better to walk away from a relationship like that...but what if you can't? It might be a co-worker, client, or even a family member. Then what?
On first response, it's hard to not be hurt and maybe even lash out in anger--bite back like a wounded puppy. Then in the back of your head you hear it: hurt people, hurt people; healed people, heal people. People that are hurting inside or that feel pain (whether physical or emotional), are the ones that so often seek to hurt others. Or maybe they don't. Maybe they just keep their pain inside and don't let it show...except that it shows to everyone but themselves, apparently. Hurt people hurt people. Out of the abundance of the heart flows the tongue. Garbage in, garbage out. Here's a news flash for those of you reading this that are hurting: please get help. You aren't hiding anything. We know you're hurting. It's time to deal with it.
Healed people, heal people. I'm not saying that people that have worked through the hurt have miraculous healing powers, but I am saying that they may have a greater propensity to see past the initial slight. People that have been healed, understand that a healthy person doesn't pretend. People that have been healed don't need to pretend because they are comfortable with who they are, or are working to be. No one is perfect, aside from Christ. No one. But I am still likable (lovable, I dare say), worth being around, and worth knowing. Do I mess up? Absolutely. Even healed people mess up on occasion, but we're willing to talk about it and work it out. But we don't need to pretend.
How can you be a genuine lover of people today? How can you be real with yourself and those in your life? Real and sometimes difficult is much richer than fake and semi-hidden unhappiness.
Make it a beautiful and real day, friends.
When you're done appreciating yourself for a moment (or setting an appointment with a therapist), click your way to Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook to see what color fun I'm having. You can subscribe to this little blog to have my insights delivered to your inbox by entering your email in the box below. You can also find me at www.JensWallsTalk.com. Thanks for stopping by.